Chapter 1
Chapter 1 Valentine’s Day. My ex-girlfriend, Sarah, sent her wedding invitation to our group chat. My friends’ profile pictures popped up one by one, sending their well wishes. Mine stayed silent. Someone joked, “Dude’s probably kicking himself. Sarah’s a billionaire now, a real-life princess from a wealthy family, you know.” “He was such a goddamn idiot, now he can’t even lick her boots.” I broke up with Sarah the year she loved me the most, and jumped into the arms of a rich woman. Now she’s got it all – career and love – and she’s rubbing it in my face. My profile picture remained stubbornly still. Sarah sent several red envelopes in the group chat, looking smug as hell. “What a goddamn money-grubbing moron! The money’s right there, and he won’t even pick it up?” “Better than selling your ass to some rich hag for pennies,” someone else chimed in. The group erupted in laughter. Then, someone quietly added, “Ethan’s dead. He died alone and destitute, didn’t even get a chance to sell his ass.” 1 The chat went silent for a few minutes. Sarah sent a vomiting emoji. “If he actually had the guts to kill himself, I’d give him some credit.” “Ethan, don’t be a coward. Getting your friends to plead for you is useless. I’m not forgiving you, no matter what.” A friend, Jason, paused before sending several videos to the group. “If you don’t believe it, see for yourselves.” These videos were secretly recorded by Jason. He originally planned to post them online to humiliate me for Sarah. The first video played. I was in rags, sitting in a dilapidated building, eating something. Jason walked in with his phone, a wicked smile on his lips. “Well, well, look who it is, Ethan. You’ve gotten awfully skinny. Eating like a monkey.” I ignored him, eating my meal. A pain in my lower back made me wince. An unbearable itch made me scratch myself constantly. Jason took a step back, his mocking smile widening. “Did the rich broad suck you dry? Got some nasty disease, huh?” The pain was excruciating; I couldn’t eat anymore. I looked up and laughed, a self-deprecating laugh. “Just got kidney problems.” Jason paused, momentarily stunned. He looked me up and down thoughtfully. He noticed my patched-up clothes and the fast-food leftovers I was eating—sour, smelly leftovers, more like garbage. He scoffed. “Serves you right for dumping Sarah for money! This is what you get for chasing rich women.” I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. I laughed. “Whatever, as long as she’s happy.” “Don’t give me that crap. You’re just pretending to be heartbroken now that she’s successful.” “Look in the mirror, you pathetic excuse for a man. You don’t even deserve Sarah anymore.” Jason sneered, disgust and disdain plastered across his face. After further taunts, he turned to leave. He accidentally stepped on a moldy bun in the corner. I hobbled over, picked it up, and brushed off the dirt. “Careful. That’s my dinner tomorrow.” Jason stared at my limp, at the dirty bun, utterly bewildered. He seemed to be witnessing something unbelievable. I shrugged, nonchalantly explaining. “Got beat up for rummaging through someone’s trash. It’s fine, I’m used to it.” Jason looked at me, his brow furrowed. “What am I supposed to say? You’re scavenging for food like a beggar. Doesn’t your rich woman take care of you?” He looked around. He saw an old woman sitting in the corner, crying. He approached her and gasped. “Aren’t you the rich woman who’s been supporting Ethan? What happened to you?” I didn’t say anything. I just looked at the weeping woman, my expression slightly dazed. After a long silence, I spoke bitterly, “There’s no rich woman. That’s my mom.” 2 “What?” Jason was speechless. My mother cried even harder. “It’s all my fault. If Ethan hadn’t come to pick me up, people wouldn’t have mistaken him for a kept man…” My mother, in her younger days, was vain and abandoned her husband and child. Now, old, frail, and sick, she was sent back. I went to pick her up that day. Her rich woman getup implicated me. Jason stared at me, a mix of disbelief and disappointment. “Why didn’t you explain? Do you know what your friends are saying about you?” Gigolo, gold digger, the biggest loser… I clenched my fists, but kept smiling. My tone was tinged with self-deprecation. “Yeah, so what? As long as Sarah believes it.” Jason’s gaze lingered on me, a hint of shock, as if he were seeing me anew. My mom sighed. “You’re so stubborn, sometimes I think you’re an idiot. You actually did this for her…” “Mom!” My face hardened, cutting her off abruptly. Seeing my distress, Jason wisely left. But for the next few days, he kept checking on me, phone in hand. “Ethan, scavenging for food. Isn’t that disgusting? This place has good lunchboxes, eat this.” “Your clothes are falling apart. Here, wear this.” He pretended to despise me but subtly bought me food and clothes. Recently, he excitedly dragged me to the community office. “I got you approved for welfare. It’ll make your medical bills cheaper.” My eyes dimmed. I refused to go. I hobbled back, sat down on the cement, maintaining a smile. “My kidney disease is incurable.” Jason’s pupils widened, disbelief etched on his face. I hobbled back, sat down on the concrete. After a long silence, he finally found his voice, choked with sobs. “But…your mother needs it. She hasn’t eaten properly for days. If you don’t take her to the hospital…” “My mom has late-stage lung cancer. Incurable, too.” I hung my head, my expression fading. My mom had started rambling yesterday; she wouldn’t last much longer. Soon, I’d be completely alone. Jason stared at me with sorrow, unable to offer any comfort. Yet, he managed a weak smile and patted my shoulder. Suddenly, his eyes caught something. He snatched the photo I was hiding in my palm. His eyes flickered with complex emotions. “After all these years, you still keep Sarah’s picture. You want to see her?” I nodded frankly. I laughed, a genuine laugh this time. “Of course! I want to know how she’s doing.” Jason frowned, then gave me her social media handle. “She’s doing great, always posting updates. It’s just… you should see for yourself.” I didn’t dwell on the meaning behind his words. I excitedly opened her video. But the moment I saw her boyfriend, the smile faded from my eyes. “Don’t blame her. You broke up with her! Her boyfriend is good to her. Last year, Sarah also had kidney problems, and he took care of everything.” “You claim to care for her, but you never did anything concrete.” Jason grumbled, playing with ants on the ground. I lowered my gaze, hiding the desolation in my eyes. I tried to force a smile, but the curve of my lips was stiff and unnatural. My mom, as if having a last burst of energy, started sobbing. “Who says Ethan didn’t do anything? He used all his savings to buy a plane ticket overseas to anonymously donate his kidney for her.” “He got a kidney infection on his way back, had no money for treatment, and now his other kidney is failing.” Jason stood up abruptly, his feelings a complex mix. After a moment of silence, he seemed to make a decision and pulled out his phone. “I’ll explain everything to Sarah.” “No!” I quickly grabbed his hand. The sudden movement made me dizzy. Jason quickly helped me sit down, his face grave. “Ethan, why are you so stubborn?” I gasped for air, smiling weakly. “My illness is incurable. Why bother her?” “With her personality, she’ll drop everything and come back. I can’t drag her down. She has a bright future.” “You…” Jason stared at me, lost in thought. His gaze fell on my phone. He snatched it and started checking. After a moment, he let out a relieved laugh, tears welling in his eyes. “Everyone said you took millions from Sarah’s mother, but your bank statements show less than ten thousand these past few years. I was right. You love Sarah so much, how could you fall for money?” “I’ll post this to the group chat, shut those gossips up.” I stopped him again. Meeting his questioning gaze, I gave a bitter laugh. “I did take it.” 3 “But I donated the check. A child was severely burned and needed a large sum of money.” I spoke lightly, looking up at the dilapidated ceiling, fighting back tears. Jason’s expression shifted repeatedly, clearly furious. “If it wasn’t about money, why did you break up with Sarah? You know how much she cared for you.” I laughed. My shoulders shook with laughter. I turned away quickly, hiding my vulnerability. When I spoke again, tears streamed down my face. “Because she cared too much. I didn’t want her to suffer with me.” “She’s a rich kid, born with a silver spoon. Her parents are divorced, but if she goes abroad with her father, she’ll still live comfortably.” “But she stayed for me. To buy me decent clothes for job interviews, she sold the watch her grandma gave her.” “For six months with me, her fingers became rough and chapped. She gave up painting and learned to haggle with market vendors.” “She shouldn’t live like this. She’s a princess; she should live in a palace, not in a cramped apartment with me, looking at the stars.” A long silence followed. Neither Jason nor I spoke. Only my mother’s weak moans could be heard. I held her hand until her moans ceased. Mom died peacefully. But this night was far from over. Perhaps summoned by death, I started passing black stools, experiencing severe heart failure. Jason paid for me to be admitted to the ICU. He called out urgently by my bedside. “Ethan, you have to pull through!” I had some consciousness left, but my tears wouldn’t stop. I weakly raised my hand. Jason quickly understood, searched for Sarah’s social media, and put my phone in my hand. “Ethan, maybe call her.” His voice trembled, tinged with a plea. I hesitated and shook my head. My finger accidentally tapped a like button, and I received a private message. “Ethan? Don’t tell me you regret it. Unless you’re dead, I won’t forgive you. You don’t know yet, but I’m getting married.” I blinked, my vision blurring. I didn’t even have a chance to send her a congratulatory message. I tugged on Jason’s arm and gestured. He understood and called Sarah for me. The phone was answered immediately. “Hello?” I smiled. I finally heard Sarah’s voice. “Congratulations.” I tried to keep my voice steady. But my breathing was already weak; the nurses wheeled me to the emergency room. They tried to take my phone, but failed. They accidentally hit the speakerphone. There was a pause, followed by Sarah’s mocking voice. “I don’t deserve it. Your voice makes me sick.” “Your voice is so weak, are you too old and useless? Did the rich woman kick you out?” She was always observant; she noticed something was wrong with my voice. I forced a smile, trying to sound cheerful. “The rich woman and I are on vacation.” With my last word, My hand fell limp, my eyes lost their light, leaving only emptiness and peace. There was a silence on the other end, followed by Sarah’s furious scream. “You coward! Why don’t you just die already?” The nurse grabbed my dropped phone and scolded, “Please don’t agitate the patient. He’s…” Before she could finish, a paramedic screamed, “The patient has no vital signs!”